Eyes Wide Shut

It was what humans call the "dog-style." I've seen it once on an art film my human was watching once on DVD. (He is someone who is too embarrassed to watch real porn, my human.)

Interesting why they call it "dog-style" when it is the preferred position of so many animals, including men called "homosexuals." This term is even more interesting, but there is a better time to discuss this, and I am too engrossed with what is happening.

Poor Richard. There he is on his bed, pretending to be asleep, faux snores and all (Richard never snores). Beside his bed, on the floor carpet, Beta Male and Alpha Male are doing the dog-style. It’s dark but I can see them here from my favorite lounging spot, on the top of the dresser.

Beta Male is on top of Alpha Male, which is a curious thing as well. Then again, they are considered different by other humans, so what do I know. (Maybe there are feline homosexuals. I have just never bumped into them yet, since I never go out of Richard’s apartment.)

When Richard let Beta and Alpha in, I knew at once they’ll do it. I smelled it. They reeked of it. Richard of course did not have an idea. He only knows he is being kind by letting his friends sleep over here for the night. Richard’s an intelligent guy though not really what you’ll call smart. He fancies Alpha and could not say no to Alpha’s every wish.

It’s a good thing he has me. I can look down on my perch here on the dresser and watch these humping, groaning males, content in my knowledge that minutes before these two rolled off Richard’s bed and onto the floor, I had already peed on the carpet.

Richard is my beloved idiot, but he has a smart cat like me. ▪

[313 words]